Pipsquack

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It would seem that more people are into Satan (over 1000) than Santa (103). Ho. Ho. Ho.

I have a little red Dodge Neon for now! Have I mentioned how much I love automatics? No? There is a reason for that: I dislike automatics, even those funky automatics that let you push the shifter over to the side and manually go between automatic gears or something. Sure, they make it convenient to sip coffee or fiddle with an MP3 player, but you end up giving up so much for that pseudo-luxury.

So, yeah, this car is an automatic. It also has blind spots. The blind spots have blind spots, even. There is a car to my left flank that I cannot see in the mirror? No problem! I will just rotate me head and stare directly into the giant opaque metal band between the front and back doors/windows. You cannot see the car! There is even a blind spot on the speedometer, the upper middle, between the speeds of about 30 and 70. I can tell if I am going too slow. I can tell if I am going too fast (by this car's standards, at least). I have no more granularity than that without kinking my neck all funny. A bright idea occurred! I will simply adjust the steering wheel! It would not adjust UP any further (it seemed to be designed for someone of shorter stature), but would adjust DOWN, which did not work so well. To get it adjusted down enough to actually SEE the speedometer, I felt like I was getting an intimate lap dance from the steering wheel.

I have several flavors of yummy green tea and several cups o' dark miso soup. There are also several fresh and tasty juices here. Just what the doctor ordered! MMMmmmm…

Posted in: Dear Diary

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