Beat My Guest

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Last night contained a couple of culinary experiments. First off, was the lasagne. This was a recipe of my own invention. Or rather, it was a hybrid–not a genetic hybrid like Brundle-Fly or goats that spin spider silk (I can just picture a pulsating green mound crawl out of the lasagne pan). It was a hybrid more like memes. Anyway, in case you are interested:

Piecemeal Lasagne, Mark 1

13×9 pan
1/2 large onion, chopped
1 shitload of crushed garlic (somewhere between 6 cloves and an entire bulb)
1 handful (5-6) of shiitake mushrooms, diced
6 cups loosely packed fresh spinach
1 can artichoke hearts (8-9 oz)
2 jars pasta sauce (onion & garlic flavor)
2 cups mozerella cheese
2 cups ricotta cheese olive
oil cooking spray
12 lasagne noodles, cooked, room temp.
1-2 cans sliced olives

* Spray large skillet with cooking spray; heat over medium flame until hot; saute mushrooms, garlic, onion for a few minutes. Add spinach & artichoke. Cover & cook another 5-10 minutes, until spinach is wilted.

* Mix the cheeses into a gross, pasty, creamy mess. Try not to eat any, you’ll need it all later.

* Layer in the pan (list is top to bottom):
foil cover
1 liberal cup pasta sauce
4 noodles
1 liberal cup pasta sauce
1/2 of the cheese mixture
1/2 of the green mixture
4 noodles
1/2 of the cheese mixture
1/2 of the green mixture
4 noodles
1/2-1 cup pasta sauce
bottom of the pan

* Loosely cover with foil; cook in preheated oven @350 for 0:45-1:00.

* Top with olives, shredded cheese, broken glass, the giblets of small babies, digital watches, and iron filings.

Dead Man’s Float

The second eatable experiment was a little more nasty sounding. You see, there are a bunch of people on the web that I can imagine being pretty much like my friends and I, only with more alcohol binges (if that is even possible), and probably a bit more geeky. They have made up a collection of drinks dubbed Spocktails. One of these drinks piqued my interest: The Dead Man’s Float. You be the judge of its merit:

1 pint Guinness Stout
1 scoop French vanilla ice cream (French vanilla is crucial!)
1 oz. bourbon whiskey
1 sprig of mint -or- candy sprinkles

Directions: Pour the Guinness out into your favorite pub glass, leaving about 2 inches of room at the top. Pour in the bourbon, then top it off with the scoop of ice cream. Garnish with mint or sprinkles.

It sounded gross to read, but still bearable, so I thought I would gross out Meta_Kate by making one and drinking it without a worry or complaint, like a real manly man. In all honesty, it did not end up being bad at all. It was rather tasty, in fact. Next time I make it, I think I’ll have to mix up the Guinness and bourbon a bit, though. The very different specific densities made it two drinks in one. The bourbon+ice cream was good, but once that was done, you are stuck with a Guinness+ice cream concoction, which is a little odd. I’m not sure that mixing will improve it, though.

Posted in: Dear Diary Food

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